Sitting on my back deck overlooking the pool with my laptop, brainstorming for tonight’s column, I found myself wanting to dive in, but then I realized that there were big bugs dive-bombing me so bad I had to take it in the house. The southern states from Alabama to Georgia and Louisiana to North Carolina along with Illinois, Missouri, Indiana, Kentucky and Oklahoma are getting pelted by a bug called the cicada (this classification of insect in 2011 is known as “Brood 19.”)
These bugs come in yearly cycles, which emerge in nightmare numbers and have awakened from a 14-year sleep underground. A few renowned biology specialists were quoted as saying, “We should see billions upon billions of cicadas between June-July.”
When you walk outside, it sounds as though you’re in the Amazon without the monkeys making their loud ostentatious communicating chant. The more I inquired about these flying noisemakers, the more entrenched I became. The mating cries of the big, red-eyed male cicadas looking for love, is crazy loud. The Brood 19 is in your neighborhood, and even though they might not have come out yet, they are coming soon.
These flying annoying pests don’t bite or sting, but make a noise up to 90 decibels by rubbing their wings together. They come from the ground, bark of trees and plants were they laid their larva several years ago. Once they emerge from hibernation, they shed their brown skin like a snake loses its skin, and take flight and attack the vegetation of choice.
These little bug-eyed pests are attracted to noise, loud noise. As my wife was walking our two yorkies (small dogs) in the front yard close to a favorite tree of the cicadas, our dogs begin to bark loudly at people across the street. Needless to say, she was attacked by several on her back, legs and in her hair, a relentless swarm, as I sat inside drinking a bottle of water and watching ESPN. From what I understand, she broke into a faster version and great imitation of the “Elaine dance” (think Seinfeld) to fight off the attack of the killer cicadas. As my wife composed herself, a neighbor across the street who witnessed the complete situation, waved and said, “Hi, priceless!” I think you get the picture. That’s why I had to take the laptop inside.
As they start to die or their cycle is coming to an end as the biologist put it, an aroma of a stench that reeks of a smell unique to dead insects is hovering in the air.
Because of the continued NFL lockout, I’m struggling to write a column every day on events in the NFL that happened yesterday, today and will be the same happenings tomorrow, on day 93! I would rather be watching Rams practice sessions at Rams Park and as a NFL Insider covering all the NFL as a whole.
As the two sides met on Tuesday, there was an addition to the landscape. The lawyers were back in the fold. While both sides were in heavy discussions, a major nerve was hit, which sparked a verbal tongue-lashing and several individuals including lawyers were removed from the immediate situation. The meeting was reported to have regained movement and the session continued after a brief intermission I strongly believe progress is being carved out in these meetings. However, the road to an agreement is still miles away.
But the cicadas aren’t.